Fond Memories

Then there was the 'Lady' who had two totally different credit cards with our company and sent in a cheque to pay both accounts but only put the details of one of her cards on the payment form so we put it all on the one because we ain’t known for being a psychic company. She rang up with all guns blazing.
I answer the phone with my usual robotic friendliness to be met with a screaming madwoman: ‘Why is there an overdue fee on my account? I sent in a payment. You stupid F@@king idiots! Can’t you do anything right?!’
For some reason I stuck with this woman and stayed calm.
Amidst a torrent of the same screaming and yelling that indicated to me that she had spent a childhood tantruming on the floor of Coles to get chocolates, and I hope her kids do the same to her regularly, I finally realise what has happened and explain it to her. I tell her that it is completely fixable and we will wipe the overdue fees. More abuse, ‘ I can’t believe this happened, trying to steal my money! You’re all stupid idiots. You better fix this now!’
I explained that the simple expedient of letting us know that she had two credit cards and actually wanted the payments split between them would have prevented this. I didn’t mention that we weren’t psychic, because I assumed she would eventually realise this herself. ‘You should have known that’s what I wanted! Stupid company!’
So I told her I would fix it and call her once it was sorted out. I was still completely calm. She hung up still mad.
Ten minutes later she calls back crying. ‘I’m so sorry I was so rude, I didn’t mean it, I know it’s not your fault. I’m REALLY SORRY.’
No, I’m sorry lady, I’m sorry that your parents gave in to your every tantrum. They should have just given you a big whack. I'm sorry for your children who will one day emulate this disgusting behaviour over annd over again.
What she’s really sorry about is that she has clued in that we are in the same city and because I can see her address details, and with amount of abuse she has unthinkingly hurled at me, she might just get a visit of call centre rage in person. But I don’t mind and tell her it’s OK. I’ve already recommended on her account that due to her payment problems, she doesn’t get any more limit increases.